Jealousy's poison
by UnluckyAmulet
Summary: Shizune can't help feeling...replaced. She shouldn't be, but she is. She's jealous of Sakura. But can somebody comfort her? No pairings.


Hey readers! Just to say I don't own Naruto, and that there are no pairings in the fic, even if some seem to be implied. Rated T because I rate everything T.

Enjoy!

* * *

Shizune just couldn't concentrate.

There she was, sitting at her desk as she usually did when she was not down at the hospital, the sun pouring onto her desk, a giant stack of paperwork in front of her, and she just couldn't keep her focus on it at all. She'd picked up her pen and then put it back down again about fourteen times now, and nothing had been done.

This was NOT like her.

Shizune bit her lip, frustrated. Usually she dove into her paperwork as it was almost as important as her hospital duties, what with all the medical reports and medicine records that needed to be organised or passed on. She never particularly minded having to do paperwork- it kept her busy and helped her to feel useful when she had a day off from the hospital. She had even learnt to enjoy it.

But today, she just couldn't do it.

With an irritated sigh she got up, as though she had just been rudely disturbed while doing something incredibly difficult and important. Shizune began to pace around her office, absent-mindedly tidying the stack of papers on her desk and closing the doors on her filing cabinet. But not even this was working well enough to get rid of the persistent feeling that was trickling through her veins, slowly threatening to spread through her.

Shizune stamped out of her office, slamming the door as hard as she could behind her.

A feeling of bitterness washed over her, making her give an agitated sigh. She couldn't pretend to herself any longer. It was unbearable.

The truth was, Shizune knew exactly what was bothering her. And it had nothing to do with paperwork or an untidy office.

What was bothering Shizune was...

Was _her._

Shizune hand a hand distractedly through her short black hair. She knew she was being childish. She knew that perfectly well, and was embarrassed that she felt in such a way. But still...

Even a ninja feels something at some point, even if not all the time. And whether or not it was an immature way to think, the feeling was there.

Shizune was jealous.

And not only that, but it was _who_ she was jealous of that seemed almost laughable.

Haruno Sakura.

Yes. Even a jounin like her...was jealous. Of a Chuunin.

And it ashamed Shizune to think that. To be so pathetic.

But she knew it was the truth.

She was not sure when, exactly, she had started to feel like this. It certainly wasn't when Tsunade had first allowed Sakura to become her apprentice, that was true.

And yet...

Shizune was pacing up and down the corridor now, hands clasping and unclasping. Her bottom lip was starting to hurt from the amount of times she had bit into it without thinking. She felt strangely light-headed, as though some great pressure had been lifted from her. But at the same time, admitting the problem to herself suddenly felt like it had just become bigger.

Abruptly, the healer ninja stopped.

_'This isn't the way to confront this problem.' _Shizune thought to herself. _'I should just have a day off, just for myself.'_

It wasn't often Shizune thought like this, but she knew that not having a day off every once in a while simply lead to stress, illness and probably a collapsed social life.

With this thought in her head, Shizune continued down the corridor with a somewhat more purposeful walk. But something still nagged at the back of her mind, even with the cheery prospect of spending some time to herself.

"Shizune-San!"

She stopped and turned. A healer, probably in his early twenties, came hurrying over to her, clutching a stack of papers in his arms.

"What is it?" Shizune asked, puzzled.

"Could you possibly deliver these to Tsunade-Sama? I'd do it myself, but I'm needed down at the hospital."

Shizune sighed, and held her arms out, and the ninja gratefully loaded the papers into her arms.

"Thanks, Shizune-San, I owe you!"

And he sprinted away.

Shizune quickly sorted the files so she could carry them with one arm, and set off, muttering something to herself as she went. She considered just handing the papers to somebody else. After all, it wasn't like somebody was going to stop her and ask her what she was doing.

The ebony-haired healer hurried quickly up a set of stairs. As she got halfway up, she suddenly realised where she was headed: Tsunade's office.

Inwardly, the jounin cursed at herself for being so flustered with trivial emotions that she'd forgotten the layout of her own workplace. Sighing, she carried on up the stairs anyway, deciding she might as well just put the papers on Tsunade's desk and then just go out somewhere. After all, she was almost right outside Tsunade's office.

But as Shizune got there, she saw that the doors to Tsunade's office were wide open. And that Tsunade was sitting at her desk, talking to somebody standing in front of it.

Sakura.

Shizune had to actually grab the side of the wall to stop herself from tripping up, as she was incredibly surprised to see that Tsunade was not sleeping or reluctantly doing paperwork. And she was even more surprised to see the Pink Menace there too. Then she heard what they were saying.

"... But he recovered very quickly. You did very well, Sakura."

Shizune froze. The hand that was gripping the wooden beam of the wall clenched, and she saw with surprise that her nails were actually creating scratch-marks. A combination of resentment and anger toward both Tsunade and Sakura coursed through her, making the scratch-marks deepen slightly.

Tsunade was giving a compliment? To HER? Tsunade _never_ complimented people!

And, infuriatingly, neither one of them had noticed Shizune was standing there. She didn't really expect Sakura to pay her any attention. But, Shizune thought with a surge of anger, maybe if Tsunade could actually look away from her _second_ apprentice she might actually notice that her _first_ one was standing right there!

"Ah, Shizune-San!"

Shizune looked up to see Sakura smiling at her, Tsunade finally looking over at Shizune. Shizune stood there idiotically for a few seconds. For all the world, she couldn't think of a single thing to say, much less muster a 'Hello' back. Her brain seemed to have turned into a roaring blank.

Fortunately, at that precise moment, a tornado in an orange jump-suit suddenly burst into the room.  
"Hey, Sakura-Chan!"

Naruto. Who else?

Sakura, forgetting Shizune's moment of silence, gave Naruto a slightly irritated look.

"What is it, Naruto?"

Tsunade let out an amused sigh, but her golden brown eyes were still fixed on Shizune. Shizune, meanwhile, was struggling with an impulse to throw her arms around Naruto in sheer gratitude and relief that she didn't have to actually speak. Naruto was grinning happily.  
"Ne, Sakura-Chan, you're not gonna believe this!"

Naruto grabbed Sakura's arm and started pulling, talking excitedly about someone he had seen doing something outside. Shizune wasn't really paying attention- For one thing, Naruto was talking about a million miles per minute, and second Shizune was too busy contemplating whether to just turn on her heel and walk off, or just to quietly go to Tsunade's desk later and give her the files, when Tsunade suddenly said,  
"Sakura, go ahead. You've worked hard enough for today."

"Okay..."

"Yeah! Thanks, Tsunade-ba-chan!"

Naruto grabbed Sakura's wrist and dragged her out, with Sakura calling out,  
"Arigato, Tsunade-Sama! Bye, Shizune-San!"

"Y-yes." Shizune managed to say, stiffly. She couldn't help giving a small sigh of relief when Naruto and Sakura disappeared down the corridor. Then she heard an amused 'Hn' behind her. Shizune turned to see Tsunade almost _smirking_ at her from her desk. Hastily, Shizune gathered her papers importantly and came toward the desk, trying to avoid eye contact with her Master. The resentment was back, seeming to fizz through her, but this time it was accompanied not with anger, but with a strangely hollow feeling. Like she'd just had something important snatched from her. Like she had lost something.

"These papers are from the hospital. Someone asked me to give them to you."

Shizune carefully placed the files on the table, straightening the edges in an almost compulsory way, all the while aware of Tsunade's laser-like gaze on her. As the healer straightened up and turned to go, Tsunade spoke, jolting the raven-haired jounin from her thoughts.  
"Shizune."

Shizune half-turned.  
"Yes?"  
"Come here."

Quickly biting her lip, Shizune walked up to the desk, keeping her face as blank as possible. Tsunade was definitely smirking now.

"Shizune, you have been acting very oddly just lately."

The ebony-haired woman swallowed, but replied as nonchalantly as she could,

"I'm just a little tired. I-"

"For a shinobi, you're a terrible liar, you know that?"

Shizune winced, fighting back a sigh. _'Of course. What was I thinking? Tsunade-Sama is much too smart a woman to believe me-'_

Tsunade stood up, facing her flustered assistant. Her eyes seemed to glitter mischievously as she said,  
"Shizune...are you _jealous_ of Sakura?"

"No! Of course I'm not!" Shizune yelped, just a little too quickly. "Why would I be-"

"When exactly did you start feeling like this?"

Shizune was about to deny this, but Tsunade raised one eyebrow and she sighed, defeated. Running a hand distractedly through her hair, she turned her head and glanced at the door, before her jet black eyes met Tsunade's golden brown ones.

"I...just recently..." Shizune started, feeling strangely nervous now, "People have been saying what an amazing person Sakura-San is. About...how she's only 15 but already she has an amazing healing ability and incredible strength, both of which you've taught her...and...I know it's childish…but…"

As Shizune spoke, she felt strange. The words were pouring out of her, and she realised that all of it was true. And it was the first time she had actually admitted these emotions out loud, not just to somebody else, but also to herself. For all of her reasoning and rationalising, she just couldn't argue her way out of the unmistakable pangs of jealousy she had felt when she heard or saw people praising Sakura, while she, Shizune, was shoved into the background.

"I just felt...as though I was being...replaced."

Tsunade looked at Shizune, her expression difficult to read.  
"You thought Sakura was replacing you?"

A nod. The jounin had the strange sensation that her throat had just been tightened. Tsunade's head tilted to one side, an amused smile on her face.  
"You thought that I prefer Sakura over you?"

Something new in Tsunade's tone caused something to stir in Shizune's mind, but she couldn't place what this new emotion was.  
"Sakura is skilled. That's undeniable. She's already surpassed most of her elders in healing abilities." Tsunade continued, and to the jounin's surprise, the Sannin sounded sad. "Probably you as well. And eventually, it is almost certain that she will surpass me, as all good students do."

Tsunade's head lowered slightly, and she looked strangely vulnerable. She locked eyes with Shizune.  
"But that does not mean that you are of any less value then her. Especially not to me."

"Tsunade-Sama..."  
Tsunade sighed, but it seemed to be a somewhat wistful one. And then,

"You're still my first apprentice. And you know what?"

Tsunade's hand reached out, and she put her hand one Shizune's cheek, a sad smile on her face, but she looked resolute as she said, softly.

"You're looking more and more like Dan everyday."

A smile broke out on Shizune's face. And then she said something that she had not said to her master in a very long time.  
"Thank you...sensei."

* * *

Don't get me wrong- I like Sakura. She's one of my favourite characters. But while I was watching the Shippuden, I couldn't help thinking in the first couple of episodes while people were gushing about how powerful Naruto and Sakura had become, I just wondred about how characters like Shizune felt. Hands up if you spotted the pun in the title, by the way. Shizune's attacks are poison-based. Cookie for you if you noticed! 

Reviews are always good.


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